LAW OF THE WEEK : Eclipse "The RAT" Rattanovong
Ok this LAW is being awarded to ratboy because he's constantly trying to say im responsible for LAW Ill's mom's camcorder... I only used that thing in Ill's house in his parents' bedroom. His father insisted on recording me banging his wife out while he was gag balled and crying...anyways thats another story. This LAW is kind of like making fun of poor people. You know their station in life is low, so whats the point. This guy is a LAW all the way, but he's gone to extra lengths lately to insure his capture of this award.
I remember a long time ago I saw Rat at a club in dc called divas. This place is legendary for having a pathetic crowd to party with. If you're into partying with 1092 persian/arab men and 3 females this is the place to go! I was there to pickup one of these 3 females there cuz she called me and begged to get her out of there. I walk in and I see the Rat in a circle of men dancing really hard to the sweet arab rhythms. Man sweat was flying, BO was filling the air, and Rat was smiling like he was a championship clubber. Next thing I know this hairy arab gaybear comes into the room, and this guy was wearing a mesh shirt, nipples sticking out, gold chains, greasy hair, and tight rayon khakis. Eclipse sees this guy and is like "OHHHHH HAMEEEEEDD!!!! WHATS UP!!!!!!!!!!!"
I never seen one man get so excited for another man. They run up to each other and hug. Keep in mind because of his exuberant dancing Rat is shirtless at this point. The guy was dancing elsewhere in the club, so both of them are sweaty as hell. Their chests became the nasdaq of mansweat, I never seen so much bodily fluid exchanged in such volume so quickly. They kiss each other in that loser ass "we're so cool we kiss other men twice on the cheek, even though we're in america" type of way. Eyes are smiling and arms are holding them close. The best part is when they went to separate from their loving embrace, Ratboy's nipple rings got caught in Hameed's mesh shirt.
"Ouch! What the fuck Hameed" Ratboy said in grimacing pain. "How the fuck do I get out of this?"
Cool guy Hameed with his glosticks in hand, says "Heyyyy Buddy, don't worry Im your friend, this isn't the first time that this has happened." He starts licking his fingers and rubbing Rat's nipples to lubricate it, he must have done it 9 times to no avail. Not wanting to seem extra gay, Hameed decides to make light of the situation, and he starts waving the glostick behind Eclipse's head, and gyrating his hips. All I could do was pray I'd do enough drugs in life to forget this situation. All of a sudden Ratboy comes loose and limbos through the guy's legs while he is glosticking away. He musta been teabagged 3 times in his limbo but, he didnt care for they were dancing!!!!
Man I'm just angry, I can't believe a loser like Rat would actually at one point try to claim my King Clubber status, while he's dancing with fuckin persians/arab clubbers. Persians and Arabs Yuppie Clubbers are really pathetic fuckers. Thank god they are america's most hated now. All they do is come here and spend 12 yrs in college on Daddy's money. All the bitches are stuck up prewd's who act like a dick in their cooch will stop the world. The dudes all have goatees and wear armani exchange dress shirts and live to club on the weekends with their "crew" which is about 10-12 dudes who look and dress just like each other. BMW's and Mercedes only! If you drive an american car you're not cool in their world. If you listen to anything other than electronic and commercial hiphop you got no game. I guess its your purpose if you're a middle eastern clubber in life to hate everything that isnt exactly like you.
I remember once when I punched this middle eastern dude in the face in the food court at this mall. He was there with his lookalike posse of 3 dudes eating Ranch One. I walked by and bumped his table and apologized and he said "You fuckin whiteboy asshole". I said "Hey dicknose, you got some chicken in your goatee" He gets up and says to me with full on rage, the kind of rage he learned watching movies and seeing how club tough guys act, "You want a problem fucker!" Then I just stuck him and he fell back into his seat saying things like "Fuckin crazy whiteboy, Im glad I dont have my gun" His boys bitched out, and that was it, I got a free shot in for nothing. Take em when you can get em. Also if you see a clubber dude or dudette pull up their mercedes or bmw into a parking spot anywhere, key the fuck out of the car, they didnt pay for it, trust me on that. Their father will beat them up for it, and it will ruin their day.
Also make sure to objectify as many middle eastern clubber girls as prewds deserving of sexual harassment as you can. 90% of them are virgin's for "religious" reasons, but you can find them boozing and drugging it up with the best of em. If you're going to rebel, go all the way, most 13 yr olds get further with their rebellion than these daddy girls do. Their style is mall bought and their lives are occupied by talking shit about their "homegirls". Try starting a conversation up with one of em. You'll see what I mean. They all sware that their too good for the place they are in, and will roll their eyes to remind you of that. Starbuck drinking, Bebe wearing, JLo wanna be bitch ass bitches.
Ok I rambled on but remember for everyone who reads this and makes sense of it, remember there are guys like Rat who have no finer time than partying with these superficial wastes of space on the dance floor, and for that RAT you're the LAW of the week.!!
I remember a long time ago I saw Rat at a club in dc called divas. This place is legendary for having a pathetic crowd to party with. If you're into partying with 1092 persian/arab men and 3 females this is the place to go! I was there to pickup one of these 3 females there cuz she called me and begged to get her out of there. I walk in and I see the Rat in a circle of men dancing really hard to the sweet arab rhythms. Man sweat was flying, BO was filling the air, and Rat was smiling like he was a championship clubber. Next thing I know this hairy arab gaybear comes into the room, and this guy was wearing a mesh shirt, nipples sticking out, gold chains, greasy hair, and tight rayon khakis. Eclipse sees this guy and is like "OHHHHH HAMEEEEEDD!!!! WHATS UP!!!!!!!!!!!"
I never seen one man get so excited for another man. They run up to each other and hug. Keep in mind because of his exuberant dancing Rat is shirtless at this point. The guy was dancing elsewhere in the club, so both of them are sweaty as hell. Their chests became the nasdaq of mansweat, I never seen so much bodily fluid exchanged in such volume so quickly. They kiss each other in that loser ass "we're so cool we kiss other men twice on the cheek, even though we're in america" type of way. Eyes are smiling and arms are holding them close. The best part is when they went to separate from their loving embrace, Ratboy's nipple rings got caught in Hameed's mesh shirt.
"Ouch! What the fuck Hameed" Ratboy said in grimacing pain. "How the fuck do I get out of this?"
Cool guy Hameed with his glosticks in hand, says "Heyyyy Buddy, don't worry Im your friend, this isn't the first time that this has happened." He starts licking his fingers and rubbing Rat's nipples to lubricate it, he must have done it 9 times to no avail. Not wanting to seem extra gay, Hameed decides to make light of the situation, and he starts waving the glostick behind Eclipse's head, and gyrating his hips. All I could do was pray I'd do enough drugs in life to forget this situation. All of a sudden Ratboy comes loose and limbos through the guy's legs while he is glosticking away. He musta been teabagged 3 times in his limbo but, he didnt care for they were dancing!!!!
Man I'm just angry, I can't believe a loser like Rat would actually at one point try to claim my King Clubber status, while he's dancing with fuckin persians/arab clubbers. Persians and Arabs Yuppie Clubbers are really pathetic fuckers. Thank god they are america's most hated now. All they do is come here and spend 12 yrs in college on Daddy's money. All the bitches are stuck up prewd's who act like a dick in their cooch will stop the world. The dudes all have goatees and wear armani exchange dress shirts and live to club on the weekends with their "crew" which is about 10-12 dudes who look and dress just like each other. BMW's and Mercedes only! If you drive an american car you're not cool in their world. If you listen to anything other than electronic and commercial hiphop you got no game. I guess its your purpose if you're a middle eastern clubber in life to hate everything that isnt exactly like you.
I remember once when I punched this middle eastern dude in the face in the food court at this mall. He was there with his lookalike posse of 3 dudes eating Ranch One. I walked by and bumped his table and apologized and he said "You fuckin whiteboy asshole". I said "Hey dicknose, you got some chicken in your goatee" He gets up and says to me with full on rage, the kind of rage he learned watching movies and seeing how club tough guys act, "You want a problem fucker!" Then I just stuck him and he fell back into his seat saying things like "Fuckin crazy whiteboy, Im glad I dont have my gun" His boys bitched out, and that was it, I got a free shot in for nothing. Take em when you can get em. Also if you see a clubber dude or dudette pull up their mercedes or bmw into a parking spot anywhere, key the fuck out of the car, they didnt pay for it, trust me on that. Their father will beat them up for it, and it will ruin their day.
Also make sure to objectify as many middle eastern clubber girls as prewds deserving of sexual harassment as you can. 90% of them are virgin's for "religious" reasons, but you can find them boozing and drugging it up with the best of em. If you're going to rebel, go all the way, most 13 yr olds get further with their rebellion than these daddy girls do. Their style is mall bought and their lives are occupied by talking shit about their "homegirls". Try starting a conversation up with one of em. You'll see what I mean. They all sware that their too good for the place they are in, and will roll their eyes to remind you of that. Starbuck drinking, Bebe wearing, JLo wanna be bitch ass bitches.
Ok I rambled on but remember for everyone who reads this and makes sense of it, remember there are guys like Rat who have no finer time than partying with these superficial wastes of space on the dance floor, and for that RAT you're the LAW of the week.!!
posted by Zack Morris aka Alfonso Nietzsche at 2:50 PM
1 Comments:
For all the kids out there that are gonna send letters, that was written by a middle eastern person. His flagrant anti-arab racism comes from direct experience.
Post a Comment
<< Home